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Two and a Half Men (TV Series)

7.466 / 10 of 2003
30, 21, 17 min Comedy Drama Family 1080p Added: 12 Seasons - 262 Episodes
A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.
  • Director Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
  • Cast Ashton Kutcher, Charlie Sheen, Conchata Ferrell, Jon Cryer
  • 95%
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Season 1

24 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S01-E01 Chapter 1: Pilot

    Monday, September 22nd, 2003
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    S01-E02 Chapter 2: Big Flappy Bastards

    Monday, September 29th, 2003
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    S01-E03 Chapter 3: Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell

    Sunday, October 5th, 2003
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    S01-E04 Chapter 4: If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap

    Sunday, October 12th, 2003
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    S01-E05 Chapter 5: The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a Hump

    Sunday, October 19th, 2003
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    S01-E06 Chapter 6: Did You Check With the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?

    Sunday, October 26th, 2003
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    S01-E07 Chapter 7: If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake

    Sunday, November 2nd, 2003
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    S01-E08 Chapter 8: Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snoot-Ful

    Sunday, November 9th, 2003
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    S01-E09 Chapter 9: Phase One, Complete

    Saturday, November 15th, 2003
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    S01-E10 Chapter 10: Merry Thanksgiving

    Sunday, November 23rd, 2003
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    S01-E11 Chapter 11: Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

    Sunday, December 14th, 2003
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    S01-E12 Chapter 12: Camel Filters and Pheromones

    Sunday, January 4th, 2004
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    S01-E13 Chapter 13: Sarah Like Puny Alan

    Saturday, January 10th, 2004
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    S01-E14 Chapter 14: I Can't Afford Hyenas

    Sunday, February 1st, 2004
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    S01-E15 Chapter 15: Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick

    Sunday, February 8th, 2004
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    S01-E16 Chapter 16: That Was Saliva, Alan

    Sunday, February 15th, 2004
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    S01-E17 Chapter 17: Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats

    Sunday, February 22nd, 2004
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    S01-E18 Chapter 18: An Old Flame With a New Wick

    Sunday, February 29th, 2004
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    S01-E19 Chapter 19: I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You

    Sunday, March 21st, 2004
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    S01-E20 Chapter 20: Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark

    Sunday, April 18th, 2004
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    S01-E21 Chapter 21: No Sniffing, No Wowing

    Sunday, May 2nd, 2004
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    S01-E22 Chapter 22: My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet

    Sunday, May 9th, 2004
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    S01-E23 Chapter 23: Just Like Buffalo

    Sunday, May 16th, 2004
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    S01-E24 Chapter 24: Can You Feel My Finger?

    Sunday, May 23rd, 2004
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Season 2

24 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S02-E01 Chapter 1: Back Off, Mary Poppins

    Sunday, September 19th, 2004
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    S02-E02 Chapter 2: Enjoy Those Garlic Balls

    Sunday, September 26th, 2004
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    S02-E03 Chapter 3: A Bag Full of Jawea

    Saturday, October 2nd, 2004
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    S02-E04 Chapter 4: Go Get Mommy's Bra

    Sunday, October 10th, 2004
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    S02-E05 Chapter 5: Bad News from the Clinic?

    Sunday, October 17th, 2004
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    S02-E06 Chapter 6: The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance

    Sunday, October 24th, 2004
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    S02-E07 Chapter 7: A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana

    Sunday, November 7th, 2004
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    S02-E08 Chapter 8: Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers

    Sunday, November 14th, 2004
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    S02-E09 Chapter 9: Yes, Monsignor

    Sunday, November 21st, 2004
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    S02-E10 Chapter 10: The Salmon Under My Sweater

    Sunday, November 28th, 2004
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    S02-E11 Chapter 11: Last Chance to See Those Tattoos

    Sunday, December 12th, 2004
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    S02-E12 Chapter 12: A Lungful of Alan

    Sunday, January 2nd, 2005
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    S02-E13 Chapter 13: Zejdz Zmoich Wlosow (Get Off My Hair)

    Saturday, January 15th, 2005
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    S02-E14 Chapter 14: Those Big Pink Things with Coconut

    Sunday, January 30th, 2005
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    S02-E15 Chapter 15: Smell the Umbrella Stand

    Sunday, February 6th, 2005
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    S02-E16 Chapter 16: Can You Eat Human Flesh With Wooden Teeth?

    Sunday, February 13th, 2005
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    S02-E17 Chapter 17: Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam!

    Sunday, February 20th, 2005
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    S02-E18 Chapter 18: It Was Mame, Mom

    Sunday, March 6th, 2005
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    S02-E19 Chapter 19: A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise

    Sunday, March 20th, 2005
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    S02-E20 Chapter 20: I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey

    Sunday, April 17th, 2005
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    S02-E21 Chapter 21: A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On

    Saturday, April 30th, 2005
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    S02-E22 Chapter 22: That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother

    Sunday, May 8th, 2005
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    S02-E23 Chapter 23: Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab

    Sunday, May 15th, 2005
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    S02-E24 Chapter 24: Does This Smell Funny to You?

    Sunday, May 22nd, 2005
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Season 3

24 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S03-E01 Chapter 1: Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts

    Monday, September 19th, 2005
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    S03-E02 Chapter 2: Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover

    Monday, September 26th, 2005
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    S03-E03 Chapter 3: Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark

    Monday, October 3rd, 2005
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    S03-E04 Chapter 4: Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs

    Monday, October 10th, 2005
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    S03-E05 Chapter 5: We Called It Mr. Pinky

    Monday, October 17th, 2005
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    S03-E06 Chapter 6: Hi, Mr. Horned One

    Monday, October 24th, 2005
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    S03-E07 Chapter 7: Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop

    Monday, November 7th, 2005
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    S03-E08 Chapter 8: That Voodoo That I Do Do

    Monday, November 14th, 2005
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    S03-E09 Chapter 9: Madame and Her Special Friend

    Monday, November 21st, 2005
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    S03-E10 Chapter 10: Something Salted and Twisted

    Monday, November 28th, 2005
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    S03-E11 Chapter 11: Santa's Village of the Damned

    Monday, December 19th, 2005
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    S03-E12 Chapter 12: That Special Tug

    Monday, January 9th, 2006
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    S03-E13 Chapter 13: Humiliation Is a Visual Medium

    Monday, January 23rd, 2006
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    S03-E14 Chapter 14: Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded

    Monday, February 6th, 2006
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    S03-E15 Chapter 15: My Tongue is Meat

    Monday, February 27th, 2006
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    S03-E16 Chapter 16: Ergo, the Booty Call

    Monday, March 6th, 2006
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    S03-E17 Chapter 17: The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer

    Monday, March 13th, 2006
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    S03-E18 Chapter 18: The Spit-Covered Cobbler

    Monday, March 20th, 2006
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    S03-E19 Chapter 19: Golly Moses, She's a Muffin

    Monday, April 10th, 2006
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    S03-E20 Chapter 20: Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro

    Monday, April 24th, 2006
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    S03-E21 Chapter 21: And the Plot Moistens

    Monday, May 1st, 2006
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    S03-E22 Chapter 22: Just Once With Aunt Sophie

    Monday, May 8th, 2006
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    S03-E23 Chapter 23: Arguments for the Quickie

    Monday, May 15th, 2006
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    S03-E24 Chapter 24: That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite

    Monday, May 22nd, 2006
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Season 4

24 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S04-E01 Chapter 1: Working for Caligula

    Monday, September 18th, 2006
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    S04-E02 Chapter 2: Who's Vod Kanockers?

    Monday, September 25th, 2006
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    S04-E03 Chapter 3: The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress

    Monday, October 2nd, 2006
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    S04-E04 Chapter 4: A Pot Smoking Monkey

    Monday, October 9th, 2006
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    S04-E05 Chapter 5: A Live Woman of Proven Fertility

    Monday, October 16th, 2006
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    S04-E06 Chapter 6: Apologies for the Frivolity

    Monday, October 23rd, 2006
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    S04-E07 Chapter 7: Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head

    Monday, November 6th, 2006
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    S04-E08 Chapter 8: Release the Dogs

    Monday, November 13th, 2006
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    S04-E09 Chapter 9: Corey's Been Dead for an Hour

    Monday, November 20th, 2006
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    S04-E10 Chapter 10: Kissing Abraham Lincoln

    Monday, November 27th, 2006
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    S04-E11 Chapter 11: Walnuts and Demerol

    Monday, December 11th, 2006
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    S04-E12 Chapter 12: Castrating Sheep in Montana

    Monday, January 8th, 2007
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    S04-E13 Chapter 13: Don't Worry, Speed Racer

    Monday, January 22nd, 2007
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    S04-E14 Chapter 14: That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami

    Monday, February 5th, 2007
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    S04-E15 Chapter 15: My Damn Stalker

    Monday, February 12th, 2007
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    S04-E16 Chapter 16: Young People Have Phlegm Too

    Monday, February 19th, 2007
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    S04-E17 Chapter 17: I Merely Slept With a Commie

    Monday, February 26th, 2007
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    S04-E18 Chapter 18: It Never Rains in Hooterville

    Monday, March 19th, 2007
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    S04-E19 Chapter 19: Smooth as a Ken Doll

    Monday, April 9th, 2007
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    S04-E20 Chapter 20: Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot

    Monday, April 16th, 2007
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    S04-E21 Chapter 21: Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous

    Monday, April 23rd, 2007
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    S04-E22 Chapter 22: Mr. McGlue's Feedbag

    Monday, April 30th, 2007
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    S04-E23 Chapter 23: Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-Lookin'

    Monday, May 7th, 2007
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    S04-E24 Chapter 24: Prostitutes and Gelato

    Monday, May 14th, 2007
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Season 5

19 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S05-E01 Chapter 1: Large Birds, Spiders and Mom

    Monday, September 24th, 2007
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    S05-E02 Chapter 2: Media Room Slash Dungeon

    Monday, October 1st, 2007
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    S05-E03 Chapter 3: Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo

    Monday, October 8th, 2007
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    S05-E04 Chapter 4: City of Great Racks

    Monday, October 15th, 2007
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    S05-E05 Chapter 5: Putting Swim Fins on a Cat

    Monday, October 22nd, 2007
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    S05-E06 Chapter 6: Help Daddy Find His Toenail

    Monday, October 29th, 2007
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    S05-E07 Chapter 7: Our Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room

    Monday, November 5th, 2007
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    S05-E08 Chapter 8: Is There a Mrs. Waffles?

    Monday, November 12th, 2007
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    S05-E09 Chapter 9: Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids

    Monday, November 19th, 2007
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    S05-E10 Chapter 10: Kinda Like Necrophilia

    Monday, November 26th, 2007
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    S05-E11 Chapter 11: Meander to Your Dander

    Monday, March 17th, 2008
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    S05-E12 Chapter 12: A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh

    Monday, March 24th, 2008
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    S05-E13 Chapter 13: The Soil Is Moist

    Monday, March 31st, 2008
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    S05-E14 Chapter 14: Winky-Dink Time

    Monday, April 14th, 2008
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    S05-E15 Chapter 15: Rough Night in Hump Junction

    Monday, April 21st, 2008
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    S05-E16 Chapter 16: Look At Me, Mommy, I'm Pretty

    Monday, April 28th, 2008
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    S05-E17 Chapter 17: Fish in a Drawer

    Monday, May 5th, 2008
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    S05-E18 Chapter 18: If My Hole Could Talk

    Monday, May 12th, 2008
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    S05-E19 Chapter 19: Waiting for the Right Snapper

    Monday, May 19th, 2008
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Season 6

24 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S06-E01 Chapter 1: Taterhead Is Our Love Child

    Monday, September 22nd, 2008
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    S06-E02 Chapter 2: Pie Hole, Herb

    Monday, September 29th, 2008
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    S06-E03 Chapter 3: Damn You, Eggs Benedict

    Monday, October 6th, 2008
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    S06-E04 Chapter 4: The Flavin' and the Mavin'

    Monday, October 13th, 2008
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    S06-E05 Chapter 5: A Jock Strap in Hell

    Monday, October 20th, 2008
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    S06-E06 Chapter 6: It's Always Nazi Week

    Monday, November 3rd, 2008
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    S06-E07 Chapter 7: Best H.O. Money Can Buy

    Monday, November 10th, 2008
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    S06-E08 Chapter 8: Pinocchio's Mouth

    Monday, November 17th, 2008
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    S06-E09 Chapter 9: The Mooch at the Boo

    Monday, November 24th, 2008
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    S06-E10 Chapter 10: He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited

    Monday, December 8th, 2008
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    S06-E11 Chapter 11: The Devil's Lube

    Monday, December 15th, 2008
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    S06-E12 Chapter 12: Thank God for Scoliosis

    Monday, January 12th, 2009
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    S06-E13 Chapter 13: I Think You Offended Don

    Monday, January 19th, 2009
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    S06-E14 Chapter 14: David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie

    Monday, February 2nd, 2009
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    S06-E15 Chapter 15: I'd Like to Start With the Cat

    Monday, February 9th, 2009
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    S06-E16 Chapter 16: She'll Still Be Dead At Halftime

    Monday, March 2nd, 2009
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    S06-E17 Chapter 17: The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'?

    Monday, March 9th, 2009
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    S06-E18 Chapter 18: My Son's Enormous Head

    Monday, March 16th, 2009
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    S06-E19 Chapter 19: The Two Finger Rule

    Monday, March 30th, 2009
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    S06-E20 Chapter 20: Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau

    Monday, April 13th, 2009
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    S06-E21 Chapter 21: Above Exalted Cyclops

    Monday, April 27th, 2009
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    S06-E22 Chapter 22: Sir Lancelot's Litter Box

    Monday, May 4th, 2009
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    S06-E23 Chapter 23: Good Morning, Mrs. Butterworth

    Monday, May 11th, 2009
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    S06-E24 Chapter 24: Baseball Was Better with Steroids

    Monday, May 18th, 2009
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Season 7

22 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S07-E01 Chapter 1: 818-jklpuzo

    Monday, September 21st, 2009
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    S07-E02 Chapter 2: Whipped Unto the Third Generation

    Monday, September 28th, 2009
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    S07-E03 Chapter 3: Mmm, Fish. Yum.

    Monday, October 5th, 2009
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    S07-E04 Chapter 4: Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator

    Monday, October 12th, 2009
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    S07-E05 Chapter 5: For the Sake of the Child

    Monday, October 19th, 2009
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    S07-E06 Chapter 6: Give Me Your Thumb

    Monday, November 2nd, 2009
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    S07-E07 Chapter 7: Untainted by Filth

    Monday, November 9th, 2009
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    S07-E08 Chapter 8: Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.

    Monday, November 16th, 2009
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    S07-E09 Chapter 9: Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair

    Monday, November 23rd, 2009
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    S07-E10 Chapter 10: That's Why They Call It Ball Room

    Monday, December 7th, 2009
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    S07-E11 Chapter 11: Warning, It's Dirty

    Monday, December 14th, 2009
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    S07-E12 Chapter 12: Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste

    Monday, January 11th, 2010
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    S07-E13 Chapter 13: Yay, No Polyps!

    Monday, January 18th, 2010
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    S07-E14 Chapter 14: Crude and Uncalled For (1)

    Monday, February 1st, 2010
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    S07-E15 Chapter 15: Aye, Aye, Captain Douche (2)

    Monday, February 8th, 2010
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    S07-E16 Chapter 16: Tinkle Like a Princess

    Monday, March 1st, 2010
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    S07-E17 Chapter 17: I Found Your Moustache

    Monday, March 8th, 2010
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    S07-E18 Chapter 18: Ixnay on the Oggie Day

    Monday, March 22nd, 2010
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    S07-E19 Chapter 19: Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave

    Monday, April 12th, 2010
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    S07-E20 Chapter 20: I Called Him Magoo

    Monday, May 10th, 2010
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    S07-E21 Chapter 21: Gumby with a Pokey

    Monday, May 17th, 2010
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    S07-E22 Chapter 22: This Is Not Gonna End Well

    Monday, May 24th, 2010
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Season 8

16 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S08-E01 Chapter 1: Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud

    Monday, September 20th, 2010
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    S08-E02 Chapter 2: A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer

    Monday, September 27th, 2010
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    S08-E03 Chapter 3: A Pudding-Filled Cactus

    Monday, October 4th, 2010
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    S08-E04 Chapter 4: Hookers, Hookers, Hookers

    Monday, October 11th, 2010
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    S08-E05 Chapter 5: The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel

    Monday, October 18th, 2010
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    S08-E06 Chapter 6: Twanging Your Magic Clanger

    Monday, October 25th, 2010
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    S08-E07 Chapter 7: The Crazy Bitch Gazette

    Monday, November 1st, 2010
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    S08-E08 Chapter 8: Springtime on a Stick

    Monday, November 8th, 2010
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    S08-E09 Chapter 9: A Good Time in Central Africa

    Monday, November 15th, 2010
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    S08-E10 Chapter 10: Ow, Ow, Don't Stop

    Monday, November 22nd, 2010
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    S08-E11 Chapter 11: Dead from the Waist Down

    Monday, December 6th, 2010
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    S08-E12 Chapter 12: Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead

    Monday, December 13th, 2010
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    S08-E13 Chapter 13: Skunk, Dog Crap and Ketchup

    Monday, January 3rd, 2011
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    S08-E14 Chapter 14: Lookin' for Japanese Subs

    Monday, January 17th, 2011
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    S08-E15 Chapter 15: Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak

    Monday, February 7th, 2011
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    S08-E16 Chapter 16: That Darn Priest

    Monday, February 14th, 2011
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Season 9

24 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S09-E01 Chapter 1: Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

    Monday, September 19th, 2011
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    S09-E02 Chapter 2: People Who Love Peepholes

    Monday, September 26th, 2011
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    S09-E03 Chapter 3: Big Girls Don't Throw Food

    Monday, October 3rd, 2011
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    S09-E04 Chapter 4: Nine Magic Fingers

    Monday, October 10th, 2011
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    S09-E05 Chapter 5: A Giant Cat Holding a Churro

    Monday, October 17th, 2011
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    S09-E06 Chapter 6: The Squat and the Hover

    Monday, October 24th, 2011
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    S09-E07 Chapter 7: Those Fancy Japanese Toilets

    Monday, October 31st, 2011
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    S09-E08 Chapter 8: Thank You for the Intercourse

    Monday, November 7th, 2011
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    S09-E09 Chapter 9: Frodo's Headshots

    Monday, November 14th, 2011
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    S09-E10 Chapter 10: A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes

    Monday, November 21st, 2011
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    S09-E11 Chapter 11: What a Lovely Landing Strip

    Monday, December 5th, 2011
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    S09-E12 Chapter 12: One False Move, Zimbabwe!

    Monday, December 12th, 2011
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    S09-E13 Chapter 13: Slowly and in a Circular Fashion

    Monday, January 2nd, 2012
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    S09-E14 Chapter 14: A Possum on Chemo

    Monday, January 16th, 2012
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    S09-E15 Chapter 15: The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack

    Monday, February 6th, 2012
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    S09-E16 Chapter 16: Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

    Monday, February 13th, 2012
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    S09-E17 Chapter 17: Not in My Mouth!

    Monday, February 20th, 2012
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    S09-E18 Chapter 18: The War Against Gingivitis

    Monday, February 27th, 2012
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    S09-E19 Chapter 19: Palmdale, Ech

    Monday, March 19th, 2012
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    S09-E20 Chapter 20: Grandma's Pie

    Monday, April 9th, 2012
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    S09-E21 Chapter 21: Mr. Hose Says 'Yes'

    Monday, April 16th, 2012
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    S09-E22 Chapter 22: Why We Gave Up Women

    Monday, April 30th, 2012
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    S09-E23 Chapter 23: The Straw in My Donut Hole

    Monday, May 7th, 2012
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    S09-E24 Chapter 24: Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!

    Monday, May 14th, 2012
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Season 10

23 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S10-E01 Chapter 1: I Changed My Mind About the Milk

    Thursday, September 27th, 2012
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    S10-E02 Chapter 2: A Big Bag of Dog

    Thursday, October 4th, 2012
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    S10-E03 Chapter 3: Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt

    Thursday, October 11th, 2012
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    S10-E04 Chapter 4: You Do Know What the Lollipop Is For

    Thursday, October 18th, 2012
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    S10-E05 Chapter 5: That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam

    Thursday, October 25th, 2012
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    S10-E06 Chapter 6: Ferrets, Attack!

    Thursday, November 1st, 2012
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    S10-E07 Chapter 7: Avoid the Chinese Mustard

    Thursday, November 8th, 2012
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    S10-E08 Chapter 8: Something My Gynecologist Said

    Thursday, November 15th, 2012
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    S10-E09 Chapter 9: I Scream When I Pee

    Thursday, November 29th, 2012
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    S10-E10 Chapter 10: One Nut Johnson

    Thursday, December 6th, 2012
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    S10-E11 Chapter 11: Give Santa a Tail-Hole

    Thursday, December 13th, 2012
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    S10-E12 Chapter 12: Welcome to Alancrest

    Thursday, January 3rd, 2013
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    S10-E13 Chapter 13: Grab a Feather and Get in Line

    Thursday, January 10th, 2013
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    S10-E14 Chapter 14: Run, Steven Staven! Run!

    Thursday, January 31st, 2013
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    S10-E15 Chapter 15: Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It

    Thursday, February 7th, 2013
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    S10-E16 Chapter 16: Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby

    Thursday, February 14th, 2013
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    S10-E17 Chapter 17: Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries

    Thursday, February 21st, 2013
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    S10-E18 Chapter 18: The 9:04 from Pemberton

    Thursday, March 7th, 2013
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    S10-E19 Chapter 19: Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon

    Thursday, March 14th, 2013
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    S10-E20 Chapter 20: Bazinga! That's From a TV Show

    Thursday, April 4th, 2013
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    S10-E21 Chapter 21: Another Night With Neil Diamond

    Thursday, April 25th, 2013
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    S10-E22 Chapter 22: My Bodacious Vidalia

    Thursday, May 2nd, 2013
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    S10-E23 Chapter 23: Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped

    Thursday, May 9th, 2013
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Season 11

22 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S11-E01 Chapter 1: Nangnangnangnang

    Thursday, September 26th, 2013
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    S11-E02 Chapter 2: I Think I Banged Lucille Ball

    Thursday, October 3rd, 2013
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    S11-E03 Chapter 3: This Unblessed Biscuit

    Thursday, October 10th, 2013
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    S11-E04 Chapter 4: Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank

    Thursday, October 17th, 2013
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    S11-E05 Chapter 5: Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003

    Thursday, October 24th, 2013
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    S11-E06 Chapter 6: Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants

    Thursday, November 7th, 2013
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    S11-E07 Chapter 7: Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie

    Thursday, November 14th, 2013
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    S11-E08 Chapter 8: Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room.

    Thursday, November 21st, 2013
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    S11-E09 Chapter 9: Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer

    Thursday, December 5th, 2013
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    S11-E10 Chapter 10: On Vodka, on Soda, on Blender, on Mixer!

    Thursday, December 12th, 2013
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    S11-E11 Chapter 11: Tazed in the Lady Nuts

    Thursday, January 2nd, 2014
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    S11-E12 Chapter 12: Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball.

    Thursday, January 9th, 2014
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    S11-E13 Chapter 13: Bite Me, Supreme Court

    Thursday, January 30th, 2014
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    S11-E14 Chapter 14: Three Fingers of Creme de Menthe

    Thursday, February 6th, 2014
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    S11-E15 Chapter 15: Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin

    Thursday, February 27th, 2014
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    S11-E16 Chapter 16: How to Get Rid of Alan Harper

    Thursday, March 6th, 2014
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    S11-E17 Chapter 17: Welcome Home, Jake

    Thursday, March 13th, 2014
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    S11-E18 Chapter 18: West Side Story

    Thursday, April 3rd, 2014
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    S11-E19 Chapter 19: Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang

    Thursday, April 10th, 2014
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    S11-E20 Chapter 20: Lotta Delis in Little Armenia

    Thursday, April 24th, 2014
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    S11-E21 Chapter 21: Dial 1-900-Mix-A-Lot

    Thursday, May 1st, 2014
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    S11-E22 Chapter 22: Oh, WALD-E, Good Times Ahead

    Thursday, May 8th, 2014
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Season 12

16 Episodes from Sep, 2003 until Feb, 2015
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    S12-E01 Chapter 1: The Ol' Mexican Spinach

    Wednesday, October 29th, 2014
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    S12-E02 Chapter 2: A Chic Bar in Ibiza

    Wednesday, November 5th, 2014
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    S12-E03 Chapter 3: Glamping in a Yurt

    Wednesday, November 12th, 2014
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    S12-E04 Chapter 4: Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight

    Wednesday, November 19th, 2014
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    S12-E05 Chapter 5: Oontz. Oontz. Oontz.

    Wednesday, November 26th, 2014
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    S12-E06 Chapter 6: Alan Shot a Little Girl

    Wednesday, December 3rd, 2014
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    S12-E07 Chapter 7: Sex with an Animated Ed Asner

    Tuesday, December 9th, 2014
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    S12-E08 Chapter 8: Family, Bublé, Deep-Fried Turkey

    Wednesday, December 17th, 2014
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    S12-E09 Chapter 9: Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey

    Thursday, January 8th, 2015
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    S12-E10 Chapter 10: Here I Come, Pants!

    Thursday, January 15th, 2015
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    S12-E11 Chapter 11: For Whom the Booty Calls

    Thursday, January 22nd, 2015
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    S12-E12 Chapter 12: A Beer-Battered Rip-Off

    Thursday, January 29th, 2015
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    S12-E13 Chapter 13: Boompa Loved His Hookers

    Thursday, February 5th, 2015
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    S12-E14 Chapter 14: Don't Give a Monkey a Gun

    Thursday, February 12th, 2015
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    S12-E15 Chapter 15: Of Course He's Dead (1)

    Thursday, February 19th, 2015
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    S12-E16 Chapter 16: Of Course He's Dead (2)

    Thursday, February 19th, 2015
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